Things are changing, my thoughts are rapid, getting quicker and picking up pace, which sounds great but is actually a nuisance as my physical practice doesn't keep up.
Things I'm discussing mentally:
How can I change my practice; to move away from the design based thinking and be more 'art'? Does that sound weird? The processes are different as the end points have various requirements, how do I 'forget/park/ignore' the old habits?
How easily influenced am I? Does that matter? Is it influence or guidance? Am I simply being enabled by people with the tools and insight to guide?
I am drawing again and I'm loving it.
I discovered a talk by Amy Sillman which I have linked below:
https://youtu.be/BLOgc466nRk
Like Richard Serra she lists verbs to describe what drawing is/can be.
I took from the talk and my tutorials with both Catherine Baker and Kimberley Foster that drawing is so much more than pencil on paper....leading me to reevaluate my previous work. Dr Baker changed the word 'chaos', which I had been clinging on to with urgency as I really felt it was important, to the term 'collision'. It's was a moment. The moment. You know the ones....where you hit your self in the heard for not seeing to and celebrate the release at the same time. Where everything flashes before your eyes in a new light, a new frame, glistening and invigorated.
This leads me to the question, can it really be that simple? To change a couple of terms, give new frames and different angles and give a body of work more agency? I say simple although it doesn't feel like it. It feels like I've been banging my head for the past 6months hoping to shake something loose. Is it okay for these things to come from outside sources? Is that still organic? Is it still mine? Can I still say the work belongs to me?
How does a material led practice work? I'm confused as I have worked hard over the past 5years to create a practice with a conceptual context. Diving head first in to research, how do I balance the two?
Discussing her research - discussing things and nothingness how we can know things - spiritual aspects - practice is embedded in research object-based practice and also the work is done with artists in different space and in museums in their collections - the potentiality of objects - beyond themselves and allowing new work to emerge. RUMMAGING
words that shape who she is - poem - Pablo Neruda - an ode to common things - ode to things - pillars, scissor, rings bowls hats, love, all things, - link to a poem - loves the notion that objects are alive with us - the notion of an object to have agency and potential and be imagined into new words.
our objects and what they say about us: Jessie - tiny bucket- life is like filling a bucket with experience and memories all mixing together. Rachel - night sky viewer - past a future - represents something much bigger than itself Mark - pocket multi-tools - feels like he is ready - fix anything with it. always with him, shiny, heavy, tactile. Makes him feel ready. Mozhdeh - Pencil - comfortable, reliable, erase it, correct herself, trust - made of wood and connected to trees - trees are evidence of history - grew until their last day. Elaine - hat - love to be outside - always planning to go out - with her hat on. Not the hat she wanted as she can't find it. IT gets lost in pockets and in other peoples homes - they always make their way back to me. Loss of objects - hopeful it will come back. Tina - Rock with a hole in it! - had stones - always finds the rock with a hole in it. from childhood - had one with a rope that she dragged around, looking through it. Jo - picture of a chair - not a chair - the ubiquitous white plastic chair that is neither special or not, can be both comfortable or uncomfortable - strong yet fragile. meta-layer - the boundary of what an object is. Rhoda - earrings - jewellery - obsession- draw full and buys when travelling - used to make some - upcycling - tactile - customising Me- Moon kaleidoscope - multifaceted - breaking up into beautiful patterns controlling my environment - control my environment - see what I want to see - finding patterns when they don't exist - making the mundane interesting
AW- object as an idea - is an idea an object? if an idea were an object what would it look like? objects as ideas.
An issue with technology being able to touch stuff and hold it in your hands. putting things in your pockets studied theology The cloud of unknowing. the only way we can know something is to unknow something - undoing - reflecting against the grain for what knowledge it. trying to know stuff that we can't really ever fully know. Mphil - in medieval theology -Cambridge not religious and didn't want to be a vicar or something teacher training - taught religious studies? realised the power of their imagination - massive ideas were easy for them to talk about adults were closed off from them. children - worked at kettles yard - loved talking o people about the things in the house.
Cut out again
Museums Sheffield Ruskin gallery There she met Kimberley - Object dialogue box - unravels across the floor - the objects within it are like compasses that can guide you or interact with the exhibitions/displays Manchester gallery - object dialogue box - beehive - trolley - tower
Phobia to buttons - a cat with buttons on its head -koumpounophobia fear of buttons Mary Greg - 1850-1950 - collector - spoons, textiles etc - not displayed. Mary Greg box - like a house sewing kit - BREAK a box to take it out - the first version is a museum-style box - plastisol - uses for holding objects can be cut with a hot knife house box - Karl Foster - used to take the collection out
Royal Armouries - Leeds - a collection of weapons, guns etc conservation cf. access
Sainsbury centre for visual arts, University of East Anglia - Norman Foster architect - aircraft hanger - supposed to look like their living room - intimate but situated in a big open space. Lie down in a gallery - booklet
To give poetry a voice is a tricky thing; its translated in such an individualistic way when read as a flat text that to speak it can provide agency or urgency but may also change its perception to those that have already perceived its voice in their own head.
At the end of MA1, I was starting to share some text-based work - I was uncomfortable and unsure where is would sit. I sat with it though, stopped resisting and let is flow when it was ready; normally when I'm uncomfortable or thinking too hard. The release has been greater when I'm FEELING, the angst of a teenager in a group of peers, the threat of defeat, in a discussion/debate, the worry of time.
I'll share some below in their formatted nature:
1.
Expectations to be freely burdened selfishly open marinating in practice Non-stop Til it pops Or the plot lost.
2.
Choosing the cliché, The ego wants it; to be outlived beyond genes, suffering for satisfaction.
3.
Stitching, embedding, encasing it in, binding stories entombed into work to speak for itself. Be unseen while being seen, read less of me, read my visual language. Don't understand? That's not my problem. I'll dilute it for you, a sprinkle of me to digest. Maintain the intensity, judgement on women, expected, judgement from society, a given. Sacrifice for it sacrifice all of it it does not matter just the work. Want them. Want me. They are commodities I am a commodity.
Consume me.
4.
Layers Distance Transparency
Layers add transparency Layers make opacity Layers make body Body makes validation Validation gives weight Weight gives body Body made of layers Layers are opaque Opaque avoids transparency Transparency avoided.
To see through is to see clearly Unobstructed. Does obstruction give interest Or avoidance? To see clearly removes the layers, looking for transparency removes the layers that are needed, layers of interest and context.
To be layerless but be layered.
5.
6.
To feel numb Withdrawal To be judged, Expectation To be in a world Existing
7.
I will not be judged by my writing so I refuse to make writing. I will be judged for not writing.
I will be judged.
8.
Hostility, condescension. Movement. Allegiances pledged, Movement requested, status stationery. In out, back forth, struggle. Struggling Seen Unseen remaining vague. Complaints Unwanted Speaking out stay quiet.
9.
Requisitioned power, Ignored incitement, that is uncomfortable. Clean it up, please. Honesty is requested, But make it metaphoric, coded. Think as a 'we', in a loop of narcissism. A truth to be worked at, unresolved introspection. Show the struggle, without victimisation. Within the complexity remain visibly invisible.
10.
Collision of dialogues Practice Colliding of people Practice Colluding of counterparts Practical Conclusion of parts Enviable Crisis of conclusions Inevitable Critical collisions End.
After the group critique, I acted immediately on the feedback. I utilised my eager-to-please students as camera holders so I could take some equipment for a walk. Gathering materials around the art room I found some synthetic mohair in a slightly shimmery grey, a thick charcoal stick, a couple of soft graphite sticks, and a Berol thick marker.
Lassoed with the yarn, the 6B graphite stick was first for a stroll, happily dragging behind me as I paced the classroom. The students giggled, and watched on hesitantly and expectantly - the line was faint. The process left me feeling slightly deflated at the vagueness of the traces left behind.
Softer graphite was next. This would work, I was sure but alas, after the initial pacing and expectations a line just as vague as the first was left. The process felt a little easier though, less exposing.
The third walk was accompanied by a thick chunk of charcoal, who also accompanied me on a fourth walk after being worn down on the paper to see if the rough edge would make a difference. Still, the paper resisted the instruments and the traces were light and tentative.
Action was required. This activity needed an outcome; the students were watching, starting to feel disappointed by the repetitive act that left them without a conclusion. The noose was cast around a thick black marker, the pace was slowed and the angle of the instrument was adjusted slightly; this time it would work and I would make sure of it.
A sigh of satisfaction was heard, the students were lifted at the sight of the black line following their teacher as she paced up the three sheets of paper once more. They giggled about the marks on the floor and the lack of shoes. They were satisfied that the goal had been achieved and a line had been drawn.
In one final stand, I bunched the instruments together, hoping their collective might would give a product that would fill me with a similar satisfaction that the students had voiced. It did not appear during the act, or in the moments immediately after. But something changed when the work was lifted from its horizontal position on the floor and hung on the classroom wall; vertically from floor to ceiling, lines dropping to the ground in a slightly wobbly fashion. Here there was some gratification. The long strip of paper required a ladder to handle it, it felt unwieldy and I liked that. As it hung on the wall behind the door, but on the facing wall of the classroom, various students inquired as to what it was. They discussed it when I gave no indication: a road, a tree trunk, a path. Regardless, they almost always offered something that took them somewhere, indicating movement, or growth; direction.
wanting to explore process and materials but struggling to link the work
and then Catherine Baker happened!
materials led practice - I don't know what that is or how to approach it - unlearning design background.
it felt good and the feeling of feeling felt good!
the sensuality of the materials.
Feedback from cohort:
Continuum of calm across a rocky road - put an object in (to the book form)
thread - the thread has potential
took the line with me - over concrete and drag graphite - temporality -
possibility and a period of time.
fabric or glass - horizon/division
space and anxiety - draw lines on to different elements - powerful and architecture of space - in a space
boundaries and bound - continuum- Jacobs ladder
windows - line above and below
sewing a line through lots of different things
the terminology refreshes
reframe
understand the material process of being an artist - going through the process of making
scale
What happens when you take the line outside?
or a line that disappears after a bit of time - prisons - the great escape - soil dumping.
francis alys
materials that graphite can't stick to
what happens walking through that line?
integrate previous in to current
Anthony Gormley - steel lines crossing a space @ketttles yard - walk under/around
do you feel more comfortable using textile techniques? as in sewing a line as you did in your previous work?
I'm interested in knowing if this work in direct response with your feelings? What happens when you rotate some of these pages so that the line is broken up? - I wanted to ask you about scale too
Feelings about my practice: limited in terms of…. What am I trying to tell them [the audience]?
articulate a regular routine
punctuation of encounters
punctuate routine
celebrating or mundane?
Talking about the process - what does it mean when I do that.
1 - entity - collisions - in terms of happenings
2 - different materials - drawings on tracing and sandpaper - bring them together - butt up against, a more difficult counterpart.
Fixing them together - simple and how they collide.
-----Go back and see how they collide [previous work]
Leporello approach - concertina approach - a continuum - the fold creates a new space - make the folds out of new materials - wet and dry sandpaper -
a line is dictated by the substrate it's on - one material across all surfaces.
Allows for the intimacy of a book but could be 12 foot long or A2 so awkward to handle or attached to the ceiling.
How do you want people to behave? looking up and being intimate at eye level, allows for intimacy and distance in its framing.
I’m a materials person - embrace it!
What do materials represent - the difference through materials - the materials are anchored into the everyday - found materials - cardboard packaging, plastic bags; start with the simple materials and then look into the materials and what they might mean?
Structure line.
put work away - sit with them and unpack them.
not diarised - what did it mean when the same line travelled from one space, from entity to entity?
bringing together, sand things down - reinstate - erase parts to leave the junctions
To summarise:
FOCUS ON WHAT IT MEANS
how do they engage with it?
do they understand my intentions?
Leporello - small to large-scale - intimate object 20 versions x 12 feet long
Wallpaper by B. Makhoul - a line in space within so you can’t separate - immersive
bullet wallpaper - Palestine - looks pretty but symbolises violence and conflict - in the home
watch out for diarising the actions and question what is happening.
moments of collision
KFoster & CBaker Collision paper
-in chemistry - in proximity, they react
NOT CHAOS
Notes from Catherine Baker:
These are some of the words I wrote down as you were speaking:
Collage/fusion/adaptive reactions/ circumstance beyond control/ invented narratives/ routine/collision – collision of materials/requirement of proximity/ folds and joins in a Leporello.
I think you need to embrace the fact that you’re clearly a materials-driven person and explore the way in which two (or more eventually) materials can collide and how a repetitive act across them that is identical can be shaped by the interaction with the substrate.
I’ve attached an image/part of a Print I saw as part of IMPACT 10 in Santander on September 18. Plus the screenshot is Victoria Ahrens whose work is really interesting. Also classically you could look at Anselm Kiefer (also attached his lead books) and the idea of a Leporello type construction. I’ve included Kiefer as the ‘happenings’ collisions could be material based i.e. A chemical reaction; if you leave a watery gel drop overnight on a sheet of mild steel by the morning there will be a rust spot that signifies and records the ‘collision’ encounter.
I hope all these things help and remember to give yourself space to unpack what you’ve made and contemplate both it and its meaning for others.
Agreed actions:
FOCUS ON WHAT IT MEANS
how do they engage with it
do they understand my intentions
Leporello - small to large-scale - intimate object 20 versions x 12 feet long
watch out for diarising the actions and question what is happening.
moments of collision - everyday with everyday materials.
![Sol LeWitt, ‘[no title]’ 1971](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/smF6LGikG3v5z8ICrBJFSZ_TDyT0lMcpvRXxIsZ81-tvFqdq_mODNGq-kxKib___PL-VlDzGVFkV-dTq7ZdfMYwqL5fwRJ5oFf-zXXYfTg381X0-wp24KbeoMXrZC3b8DcZtbZvj)